Nay? No, Horsie Goes "Wii!" - The UpStream

Here's the scenario. You were one of the lucky few who, within the first three months of the Wii's release, managed to snag a console for yourself. You've reached Pro status on all of the Wii Sports games, sent shells flying at Wario in Mario Kart Wii and even gotten your Wii Fit age all the way down to 14! Is that even possible? So what else can you do on a night when you're bored and there's nothing on TV besides reruns of Wings (I love Wings) on your local broadcast channel? You think up other ways the Wii can be awesome of course! Yes, the Wii's racing wheel and sports accessories are cool and I'm sure you've already conjured up being able to sit in an actual race car or ride Epona around the Lon Lon Ranch. You may have even considered the fun you could have if you could hop on the back of Spyro and go nuts! Unfortunately, the Balance Board isn't too cozy to sit on, and the WiiMote just isn't intended for your butt! Well put aside all your worries, because one of Nintendo's lead research developers, Genyo Takeda, has come up with the solution to your posterior problems: The Wii Horseback Riding Saddle! I can't make this stuff up!

Siliconera had some extra time this week to dig through some European patents to find this product from Nintendo. It's an inflatable seat, from what seems to be a similar design of an inflatable exercise ball. It can be compacted to store it away or, more importantly, get it to the retailer for sale. This rendition of a Richard Simmons exercise aid also has a pocket for the Wii remote, which will be able to sense movement from the accelerometers in it. Users can hold the nunchuck in their hand, which was described by the patent as "a raised hand for balance as in Bronco riding, a lasso, a sword or other weapon, etc."

Nintendo hasn't mentioned much on the exact details of the gameplay they intend to simulate with this device, but they have stated that the console could display anything from the back of a horse's head all the way to a battlefield or other locale the virtual horse can ride through. Of course, the images will differ based on the position of the player and the Wii remote.

But wait, there's more! This stallion stool won't be used just for horses and what could possibly be Wii Jousting. Nintendo has listed in their patent a cornucopia of creations in addition to the trusty steed, with animals from "bulls, camels, elephants, burros, dolphins, whales, dragons, griffins, unicorns, giant eagles" down to vehicles like "hang gliders or other aircraft, a magic carpet, a motorcycle, a jet-ski, a land or sea exploration vehicles."

Looks like Bob's Soapbox sales may be declining when this thing comes out.